“Laugh Until You Cry with These SMS Jokes”
A young fellow was thrilled when he
discovered his wife was expecting their first child,
At the first signs of labour, he rushed her off to
the maternity hospital.
Ward 3B. Third floor. She’s had triplets,
announced the receptionist at the inquiry desk.
He ran up the stairs and barged into the
ward when he crashed into the sister, who
promptly threw him out. How dare you come
racing in here? You’re not sterile, she barked.
Sterile? Me? he shouted. Of course, I’m not
bloody sterile I’ve just fathered triplets.
Two bar pals met after not seeing each
other for a long time. My goodness, said one,
You have a funny color.
Yeah, replied the second, I’m just getting over
a rare disease.
It’s called Pistachio. First, you turn green and
then you turn nuts.
Wife: My husband is squandering all our
savings. I think he’s spending it on a girlfriend.
What will it cost to catch him?
Detective: My fee is Rs. 700/-
Wife: Go ahead. I think I can borrow that
much from my boyfriend.
A clerk went to his doctor complaining of
pain in his leg. After one glance at the leg, the
doctor asked the patient. How long have you
been walking around in this condition?
Clerk: Two weeks.
Doctor: For heaven’s sake, young man, you
have a broken leg;
Why didn’t you come to me sooner?
Clerk: Well, doc. I would have, but every time,
I say something is wrong with me my wife says
I have to give up drinking.
A celebrated judge and an almost equally
celebrated bishop were engaged in a friendly
argument about which of them had more power
over their fellow men. Explained the bishop,
After all, old man, you can only say to a man,
You be hanged; I can go very much further. I
can say to a man, you be damned.
The judge nodded, smilingly, Ah, yes, he said
But the difference is that when I say to a man,
you be hanged….he is hanged.
I married her because the saved my life.
How did she do that?
She told her dad not to shoot.