“Laughs in Every Text: Enjoying the Best SMS Jokes in India”
A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides
of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but still they
stay together.
A man’s wife has more power over him than the
state has.
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
Give a man a free hand and he’ll run it all over you.
Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants
to live in an institution?
The trouble with some woman is that they get all
excited about nothing, and then marry him.
I never knew what real happiness was untill I got
married. And by then it was too late.
I never married because I have three pets at home that
answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog
that growls every morning, a parrot that swears all
afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.
I require only three things of a man. He must be
handsome, ruthless and stupid.
When a man steals your wife there is no better
revenge than to let him keep her.
Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and halfshut afterwards.
Jis waqt khuda ne tumhein banaya hoga,
Ek saroor sa uske dil pe chaya hoga.
Pahle socha hoga tujhe jannat mein rakh le,
Phir use mera khayal aaya hoga.
Manzil ki taraf badhte raho,
Jo dil kahe usi rah ko chuno.
Peeche walon ko aage na jaane do,
Aur jo aage hain unse aage niklo.
Tabhi 1 achche Truck Driver banoge.
Kaun rakhta hai yaad namon ko,
Log chehre tak bhul jate hain.
Tum samandar ki baat karte ho,
Log aankhon mein doob jate hain.
Zindagi jaise ek saza si ho gayi hai,
Gum ke sagar mein is kadar kho gayi hai.
Tum kar do ek SMS yeh guzarish hai meri,
Tumhari SMS ki adat si ho gayi hai.
Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.
Har khushi khushi mange aapse,
Zindagi zindadili mange aapse.
Ujala ho mukaddar mein aapke itna,
Ki chand bhi roshni mange aapse.
My wife has a slight impediment in her speech,
Every now and then she stops to breathe.
I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to
interrupt her.
I like to wake up each morning feeling a new man.
To the Newly Weds: May ‘for better or worse’ be far
better than worse.
To the 2 secrets of a long lasting and happy marriage.
Here’s to good sense of humour and a short memory!
Grooms, once you marry, please remember that
when you have a discussion with your future wife,
always try to get the last two words in: “Yes dear.”
You know, the trouble with being the best man at a
wedding is that you never get to actually prove it.
May the best of your past be the worst of your future.
Married life has many Ups and Downs…May most of
yours be between the sheets!
May the joys you share today, be the beginning of a
lifetime of great happiness and fulfillment.
To our wives and lovers…may they never meet!
May you grow old on one pillow.
Dear [bride’s name] isn’t it quite funny how History
repeats itself?
[Bride’s Age] years ago your Mother and Father
were putting you to bed with a dummy…and now
it’s happening all over again.
I’ve known many, Liked not a few, Loved only one, I
toast to you.
To the bride and groom—may we all be invited to
your golden wedding celebrations…
Here’s to the bride—may she share everything with
her husband…and that includes the housework.
