“Lighthearted Laughs: Amusing Moments to Brighten Your Day”
ALL a woman really wants is a roof over
her head and the right to raise it occasionally.
Beautician to Customer: How’d you like the
beautician who filled in while I was on vacation?
Customer: Well, she was a gossip, she made
my face look blotchy, and she nearly ruined
my hair_ it was like you never left.
When Representative Battelle brought in a
bill to the house for the benefit of the
surviving seamen of the battleship Maine,
blown up in a Haven Harbor, Uncle Joe Cannon objected.
Battelle was hopping mad and getting
the attention of the chair shouted:
“Mr Speaker, there are men in this house
who would break up a funeral procession if
they were not appointed to drive the hearse.”
(Leader of a group thanks members for the way in
which all have worked together as a team—no prima
donnas or troublemakers cite this story as a contrast.)
Women to Beautician: When you’re finished with me
Will my husband think I’m beautiful?
Beautician: Maybe. Does he still drink a lot?