SLEEPING AND CRYING OF YOUR BABY
Sleep problems are the most common and disturbing in a baby’s first year of life. The overtired baby or infant can be almost impossible to manage in the daytime, and the frequent wake at night can place a strain on family relationships.
There are two types of sleep: active and passive. Active sleep is associated with body movement, muscle jerking, eye movements and dreaming. Contrastingly passive sleep is deep and restful, without body movement or dreams.
These two types of sleep occur together in cycles that last about 50 minutes at birth and 75 minutes by 4 years of age. This is the reason so many babies wake or become very restless an hour after being put to bed.
The newborn sleeps about 17 to 20 hours a day. The sleep periods usually don’t last more than five hours, and wakeful periods are not more than two or three hours. By three months, 70 per cent of babies sleeps about eight hours a night. Hunger and feeding are closely related to sleeping in the early weeks; many babies wake screaming with hunger. After about 6 or 8 weeks old, hunger is less of a driving force, and your baby will begin to wake before an occasional feed and not automatically expect food.
By 4 months, hunger rarely dictates the day’s sleep patterns, and once the infant has dropped, night cause of hunger. By this time, nearly all babies will wait for food; hunger will not produce screaming. But temper may add to the noise factor.
If a baby is overstimulated, overtired and unrelated, he will fight being put down to sleep and wake frequently. In the first months, a baby will not sleep unless fed sufficiently and then allowed to pass happily into sleep. Any pressure from the parents reflects on the baby; he will object, become sleepless and cry.
During the day, young babies should be expected to sleep after all feeds; these occur every three to four hours. Early waking can be caused by hunger and a failure to settle after feeds. It is essential to allow time for the sleep pattern to be established.
By 6 to 8 weeks old, some babies will require a “play” period after feeds before they will sleep. This requires the parents to recognise the baby’s desire for sleep, which may not be easy. When the baby is 3 or 4 months old, the afternoon sleep period will begin to shorten—for most babies of about 3 months, the number of days of sleep is generally related to the number of feeds. The change from two to one day of sleep depends on the individual child and usually occurs soon after the first birthday.
The total cessation of day sleep also occurs at individual ages and can occur anywhere between 18 months and 5 years of age. For the poor sleeper, especially at 3 to 4 months old, it may be necessary to establish a ritual about going to sleep. It is essential this ritual is established in the early weeks and during the first year.
A particular cuddling position, a lullaby, being put down to sleep in a particular position, music playing near the baby’s head and knocking, patting or stroking may be part of the ritual. Sucking and rocking during the first year almost always improves sleep, and so too does music or a pulsating sound.
Prematurely born babies have unsettled sleep patterns compared to normal-term babies, and it can take longer for them to adopt sleep patterns that are satisfactory to parents. You can indicate to your child when he should go to sleep, but it is impossible to make him sleep unless he wants to.
Tiredness and fatigue can build up to a situation of continued over-tiredness. All parents sometimes experience the overtired baby who cannot be cuddled, who screams, who won’t be soothed and who won’t feed. Tiredness can also be significant in producing a colicky baby who cries continually.
Chronic overtiredness can also account for the overactivity of infants from 6 months onwards. The 9-month-old baby who sleeps only one hour a day may be too over-tired to stop his perpetual motion, which can become controllable:
Occasional disturbed nights are part of being a parent, but constant crying and sleeplessness could also be due to a physical disorder. Discomfort or pain can be caused by a wet nappy, an open pin or wind. Wind occurs because the baby swallows air as he feeds. Burgling can help bring the wind up; this can be done by holding the baby with his head on your shoulder and gently rubbing his back.
Babies also cry because they don’t conserve heat well and may be cold. The over-anxious mother who goes into the baby’s room constantly to see if he is all right is disturbing his sleep. The baby is almost always aware of the mother’s presence and may wake up and be unable to go back to sleep.
The dummy-dependent baby who cannot put his dummy in his mouth by himself will wake whenever it falls out of his mouth. It is best to avoid giving the baby a dummy in order to stay asleep. Avoid night feeds once the baby has slept through the night for about a week.
Night waking can begin again after 6 months with teething or no apparent reason. Parents can often pat the child back to sleep in a few minutes. Some infants who have achieved mobility will wake at night with talking and singing, but this only becomes a problem if the parents join the baby and he expects them to come when he calls. Disturbed sleep patterns can also be induced by the new surroundings of holidays or the anxiety of maternal separation.
If your baby wakes frequently, let him cry it out so he learns nighttime is for sleeping. This does not apply to babies who are not mobile, and it does not work for those parents who can’t stand to hear their infants screaming.
Don’t offer bottles or breastfeeds at night, if possible, once the baby has slept through the night for a week or so.
Night light music and a cuddly toy may help the baby sleep. Between 1 and 3 years, your child may prefer to sleep in your bed or refuse to go to bed without having a drink, going to the toilet or kissing everyone in the room goodnight; if these problems persist, they may have to be viewed as disciplinary.
