“The Best SMS Jokes to Brighten Up Your Day”
HE: “Would you mind having this dance with
me?
She said, “I’m sorry, but I never dance with a child.”
He: “Oh, a thousand pardons, I don’t know
your contition.”
A wife is a woman who cants seen a garage
door twenty feet wide but can spot a blond hair
on her husband’s lapel from across the street.
REPORTER: “I’m indeed sorry. I couldn’t be
present at your latest wedding I.”
Film Actress: “Don’t worry, I’ll have another
one soon.”
He was no good. As far as husbands go —
he never went anywhere.
MISTRESS: “If this occurs again, I shall be
compelled to get another servant.”
Maid: “I wish you would, mum. There’s quite
enough work for two of us.”
And this young lady says the difference
between like and love is. “If I like them. I let them,
If I love them, I help.”
TONIGHT we celebrate my engagement to a
broad-buttocked beauty I love. How shall I toast
my wide-beamed babe?
“Bottoms up”
SEX is probably the only game in which two
can play, and both win.
On their wedding night, the bride called her
mother while the new husband lay back looking
conceited. But his conceited smile faded quickly
when he heard the bride say, “That’s right,
Momma, It didn’t hurt at all. In fact, it didn’t even
tickle.
“WOULD you consider going out with a man
like me?”
“Yes…so long as he wasn’t too much like you.”
BACHELOR: A man who can lie on the bed and
put his feet on the bedspread.
NEVER try to make love in the field of corn. It goes
against the grain.