The Digital Jokester
HECKLER: I wouldn’t vote for you if you were
saint peter.
Politician : If were saint peter you wouldn’t be
in my precinct.
The DEAD policeman on force 17 years.
The army has tested some new explosives
recently. In fact, they dropped four ton blondes
on the test site.
One particular company was having a
problem with all the employees going on a sitdown strike.
A very smart executive told the striker that
they might as well be comfortable, so he
provided them with blankets and cases of
brandy. When the brandy was half-consumed,
the boss sent in 10 young women to entertain
the sit-downers. Then he brought over the
strikers’ wives so that they could see how
comfortable their husbands were. That ended
the sit-down strike.
IF your wife wants to learn to drive, don’t stand
in her way.
My wife is such a bad driver-she got three
tickets on her written test.
FIRST Girl: I lost my job because of illness
and fatigue.
Second Girl : That’s too bad.
First Girl : Yeah, my boss got sick and tired of
me.
PERSONNEL man to trainee : “Or if you prefer,
you may elect to skip coffee breaks entirely and
retire three years early.”
NOW there’s a wig to wear to the supermarket.
It has curlers in it.
DO you want to know a way to drive people
crazy? Walk up to a complete stranger and say,
“It’s good to see you again, you lucky dog. So
you finally struct it rich! Well, see you at the
reading of the will.”
Then rush away before that person can say
any thing.
“MY uncle is still on strike.”
“How long has he been on strike?”
“Fifty-two years”.
BEN: You know something? Between my
father and me, we know everything.
Name : Oh, yeah? So tell me where’s
Zanzibar?
Ben Ask my father. That’s one of the things
he knows.
MAX: I hate playing tennis with a sore loser.
Toe : Well, I’d rather play tennis with a sore
loser then a good winner.
A sailor has been called a wolf in ship’s
clothing.
Women like the simpler things of life-men.
BOSS speaking to his secretary : “This is the
earliest you’ve ever been late.”
I’m not really late, boss. I just took my coffee
break before coming it.
EMPLOYER: Why do you ask me for a raise?
Employee : Sir, I wouldn’t ask you for a raise
but somehow my kids found out that other
families eat three times a day.