Who was the first carpenter in the Bible?
Eve. She made Adam’s little peanut stand.
Don’t send any messages, I don’t want to see you,
hear your voice, think of you, coz my doctor advised
me 2 keep away from Sweets.
I’ll give u one kiss to go to sleep. I’ll give u two kisses
to dream. I’ll give u an endless row of kisses to,
when u wake up in the morning, think of me.
I know you think I’m cute and fine,
but like the other guys, take a number and wait in line!
Sometimes I forget 2 say hi, sometimes I forget 2 reply,
sometimes my msg doesn’t reach u, but it doesn’t mean
I forget u. I’m just giving u time to Miss me.
U may b out of my sight but not out of my heart.
U may b out of my reach but not out of my mind.
I don’t know what I mean 2 u, but u’ll always be
special 2 me.
Doctor 2 husband: Tuhadi biwi te tuhada blood
group same hai.
Husband: Hovega kyun ni, 25 saal te mera khoon jo
pee rahi hai!
Husband: Shall we try a different position tonight?
Wife: That’s a good idea… you stand by the ironing
board while I sit on the sofa and fart.
U say u luv me & want 2 hold me tight. Those words
run thru my head day & nite. I dreamt u held me &
made me see dat 4ever 2gether we would be!
The bride, upon her engagement, went to her
mother & said, “I’ve found a man just like father!”
Mother replied, “So what do u want from me,
sympathy?”
Husband said, ‘‘When I’m gone you’ll never find
another man like me.’’
Wife replied, ‘‘What makes you think I’d want
another man like you!’’
A young man asks a kind priest, ‘‘Father! is it a sin to
sleep with a girl?’’
Priest told, ‘‘No my child but the problem is that u
guys never sleep.’’
Yaad mein tumhari mujhe loose motions lag gaye
hain. Hain to yeh aanso per lagta hai rasta bhatak
gaye hain.
I hate when people point to their wrists to ask for
the time! Seriously, do I point to my crotch
when I need to go to a Restroom?
A reasent studdi has shon dat peepal hoo aar vary
samaart end gud lukeeng maik manee spallings
meestaikes… vaat ees yorr opeeniun?
There are Tulips in my garden, there are Tulips in
the park, but nothing is more beautiful then our two
lips meeting in the dark!
Ek sharabi Apni eyes donate karne gaya.
Counter Clerk asks, ‘‘Kuch kahna chahte ho?’’
Sharabi bola, ‘‘Jise lagao use bata dena, yeh do paig
ke baad khulti hain.’’
Q: What’s the difference between gud & bad gals?
A: Gud gals loosen a few buttons when its hot,
bad gals make it hot by loosening a few buttons!
Most women won’t play ball untill a man provides the
diamond.
Look at the world around u; u’ll c God’s creativity.
Look at the breakfast table; u’ll c God’s providence.
Look at the mirror; u’ll c God’s sense of humour.
Faith makes all things possible, love makes all things
easy, hopes makes all things work, but ur gorgeous
smile brings all faith, luv & hope in me!
I used to think that dreams do not come true, but this
quickly changed the moment I laid my eyes on you.
The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right
beside them knowing you can’t have them.
If u see someone without a smile, give him one of urns,
coz u r among a few good people who can shine others
lives by just walking with him a few miles.
